Saturday, January 31, 2015

Family Picture - Jan 2015

Ok, I am stealing an idea from my friend Meghan of OurFishFamily.com.  Although, I'm not quite as awesome as her.  She is posting a family portrait every week in 2015.  I looked at that and thought, "That's so rad! But, I am not Super Mom like Meghan.  Maybe I'll try every month!"

So...here is my first shot!  I give you the first family photo of 2015!  Let's see if I can keep this up!



Yes, I am trying to grow a beard.  I'll post about that later.  Key word is "trying."

And, since I know you were curious.  Here are some of the outtakes:

Modeling while I set up the camera. 

More modeling. Super enthusiastic. 

So hard to get a real smile out of this kid. No clue where he gets that. 

Not sure where those bunny ears are coming from, but pretty sure it's Kim. 

Goodnight!  Go Seahawks!!!

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Conversation Pieces - Words that have the "Sh" sound

Don't worry...it's not what you think.

Desmond's class learned the "sh" sound last week.  Today, on the way to school, as I sometimes do, I quizzed him on what he was learning.

Me: "So...you learned the 'sh' sound in school?"

Des: "MmHmm."

Me: "Can you think of any words with the 'sh' sound?"

Des: *silence...he hates when I quiz him.*

Me: "Maybe 'SHoe?'  Or 'SHip?'

Des: "Richard SHerman?"

Me: "Yup...that qualifies!"

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

BEASTMODE!

It's Superbowl week!  My Seattle Seahawks are in the Superbowl!  The first team to go to back to back Superbowl since their opponents, the New England Patriots did it back in the year that they did it.  Whenever that was.

I figure this is a great week to write about the Seahawks and why I love the heck out of them!!!

I would like to start with the one and only...Marshawn Lynch!

If you watch sports, you have probably heard of Marshawn.  Or...maybe you have heard of his nickname: Beastmode!

Beastmode isn't a nickname as much as a state of play.  It's what Marshawn calls it when he is able to burst through the line.  When he runs 90 yards across the field for a touchdown.  When he drags defenders with him as he forces his way across the first down marker.

Perhaps you have heard of the famous "Beast Quake!"  A run during the playoffs that got the crowd so fired up that it actually registered on the Richter Scale!




Then...there is notorious interviewing style.  Notorious mainly because of his lack of interviewing.

The good people over at MyNorthwest.com went ahead and ranked his Top 10 interviews for you: http://mynorthwest.com/1046/2692511/Marshawn-Lynchs-10-best-interviews-ranked

Then, there is his most recent interview, done with Skittles!  Check that out here.

Of course, the media hates that he doesn't do interviews.  It's in his contract to do interviews and he doesn't do them.  The league likes to fine him for this.  Oh...and he likes to grab his crotch when he scores a touchdown.  The league likes to fine him for that, too.  Forget that murderers and rapists and wife beaters all get to keep playing in the NFL.  Don't grab your junk, Marshawn!!!

Brace yourselves, Patriots fans.  Beastmode is coming!



Sunday, January 25, 2015

Mawage

So...I'm getting married.  I've mentioned it a few times on here, but I haven't formally introduced the three of you to Kim.  Kim is gonna marry me.  And, just so you know, I have given her plenty of time to sober up and change her mind.  She still says she's going to marry me.

I met Kim on eHarmony.  As you can see in an earlier post, I was not a big fan of dating.  And, by not a big fan, I mean I hated it.  I had a couple potentials, if you will, but nothing that ended up being much.  I even got dumped twice by the same person.  That's how awesome I am.

So...I meet Kim on eHarmony and we're chatting and having a good time.  Then, I get all busy and stuff, and my cat dies, and I hate women and I travel, and I just kinda figure she's just another one that won't amount to much.  But, what the heck.  I'll give this one last girl a shot before turning off the dating profile for a bit and just spending some time enjoying life as a single dad.

We go on a date.  But, this date wasn't quite like the other dates.  It was instantly comfortable.  Like, instantly.  I showed up late because I got caught up at work.  So, I went in nervous (I hate being late).  She was already chillin' with a drink.  She got up, gave me an amazing perfect smile, with her cute little dimples, and gave me a big hug.  And, we started chatting.

Now, on other dates, it was awkward discussion until our time was up and we would give awkward hugs before going home (I have a dog, you see.  He needs to pee).  However, this time, the time to leave was coming up.  But, I didn't want to go!  I did something I hadn't done before on a date.  I called the neighbor and asked her to let Quincy out for me!

Fast forward.  We date, it's fun.  We find excuses to see each other.  Like, oh, hey...you're leaving town.  How about if I hike my ass over to your side of the lake in the middle of traffic so we can have coffee before your flight.  Or...hey...why don't you come over to my office and we can grab lunch in the middle of the day.

About 2 months (or so) in, I decide to introduce her to Desmond.  See, possibly one of my biggest criteria in finding a partner is how this person interacts with Desmond.  I may get along great with them, but if they don't like my kid (or if my kid doesn't like them), I don't plan to waste a ton of time with this person.  Kim was originally introduced as "Daddy's friend Kim."  To say Desi took well to her is an understatement.

Grandma was in town at the same time.  So, we were going to introduce both the kid AND the mother.  Talk about pressure for Kim.

We went to The Old Spaghetti Factory.  Classy, I know.  Mom, Des and I arrived first.  Mom and Des sat at one side of the table.  I sat on the other with the empty chair saved for Kim.

Kim arrives.  Desi leans over to Grandma and whispers something.  Grandma says "Oh," and looks at me.

"Desmond says he wants me to trade places with Kim," says Grandma.

Kid made one of his favorite people in the world move for the new girl.

Anyway, fast forward past multiple more dates, concerts, shows, hand holding, schmoopy eyes, etc and I decide to invite Kim on our Hawaii trip.  I mean, Des loves her, my parents love her.  And, what do you know, I love her to.  So, let's take this trip.

Well, many of you may have noticed that this whole thing moved pretty fast.  I started getting inklings of, Dang...I think I could marry this girl. Those inklings got stronger and stronger.  Until finally, I decided, Yeah...I'm gonna do this.  This girl is awesome.  Why wouldn't I want to marry her?  Everything fits!  Everything is right!  And, we're not getting any younger.  As a very wise philosopher once said, "If you like it then you gotta put a ring on it."  So, I bought a ring.

What better place to pop the question than in paradise.  So, we went out for some cocktails, took a walk at the marina and I popped the question.

Funny story, I had this routine that I had planned.  I'm not going to tell you what it was because it was totally hokey and schmoopy (I've always wanted to use the word schmoopy twice in a post).  But, it didn't involve putting the ring on her finger, simply in her hand.  So, she gets really excited, says yes (I triple checked) starts crying and throws her arms around me.  Unbeknownst to me, she slips the ring on her finger somewhere in this process.  I pulled out of the hug and reached for the hand that I put the ring in.  The ring wasn't there!  OH MY GOD!!!  THE DIAMOND RING HAS FALLEN INTO THE PACIFIC OCEAN!!!!

No no, it's ok.  It's on her finger.  WHEW!

Anyway, we're officially getting hitched in June.  We're going back to Maui!  Why?  Well, we discovered that it's actually not THAT much more expensive to get married in Hawaii as opposed to somewhere in Washington.  Weddings are expensive, no matter what.  We could cross our fingers that it doesn't rain on us and find a place that is nice enough but not bank breaking.  Or...instead of breaking the bank in Washington, let's break it in Maui!!!!

Some pics below.  If you want to follow along on the wedding details, check out our website: http://www.pankomine.com.  Please note: being aware of this website does NOT mean you're invited!!!  Kim won't let me post it on Facebook because she doesn't want everyone to assume they're invited.  So, there!  I just told you you're not invited!  Unless you are invited.  In which case, you probably already know.

She's a real winner.  We've got ourselves a good thing going on.  Hurray for 2nd chances!





Thursday, January 22, 2015

My old favorite movies are so OLD!

Often, I think about how exciting it will be to introduce Desmond to some of the things that I used to love as a kid.  Particularly movies!  There are some movies that I JUST KNOW he will love as much as I did.

  • Goonies
  • Ghostbusters
  • Star Wars 
  • Three Amigos
  • Back to the Future
You know.  The new Classics.  

But, here's the thing.  These movies are so freakin' old, now!

It's like when my dad tried to get me to watch movies from the 70s.  I was like, DANG...those special effects are so fake!

Let's take Back to the Future.  Kim and I were just talking about how we want to watch the trilogy.  My mom bought it for me a few years ago.  I just need to find it in my still packed moving boxes.  

Anyway, I was thinking about how awesome it would be to have Des watch that with me.  

Then I realized the following things. 
  • Des has no idea what a Delorean is. 
  • Des has no idea what a Walkman is. 
  • Back to the Future: Part 2 happens this year!
  • Des won't get any of the references in the Cafe 80s scene (Ronald Regan, Max Headroom, Jaws 19 (shark still looks fake), etc.
I watched the trailer for it the other day and it even caught me off guard just how old that movie looks.  

I will probably skip showing him Back to the Future, for now.  I'll wait until it moves from old to "retro."  

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Gangnam Style!

A while ago, Desmond posed the following question to me: "Dad...what does sexy mean?"

Uhhhhh

I tried, as best I could, to explain what it means.  I think I said something to the effect of, "It's a way to describe a person who someone finds attractive."

The next question was, "Is it a bad word?"  Desmond has been very curious about bad words, lately.

"No...it's not a bad word, necessarily," I respond.  "But, I don't think it's a word people would like hearing from a 6 year old."

This seemed to satisfy him.

"So," I ask, "Where did you hear this word?"

Desmond responds, "Heeeeeeeeeey, Sexy Ladies!!!"

Yes...my son learned the word sexy from the song Gangnam Style.

I will occasionally hear him singing the song when he thinks I'm not listening.  It's one of his favorite songs.  His old favorite was "Can't Hold Us" by Macklemore.  That one was more tolerable.

Anyone...in honor of Desmond's new favorite song, I give you this:

Sunday, January 18, 2015

SEAHAWKS ARE SUPERBOWL BOUND!!!! But...

Seattle Seahawks are once again heading to the Superbowl!  The first time in 10 years that a team has made it all the way to the big game in defense of their championship.

I am very excited!  SUPER DUPER excited!

So, don't misunderstand what I have to say here.

I am seeing a ton of posts from friends about this NFC Championship game being the best Hawks game, ever.  And, stats about how Russell Wilson has more playoff victories against Superbowl winning quarterbacks than anyone else.  And, other posts that seem to forget one thing.

WE WERE 2 MINUTES AWAY FROM LOSING THIS THING!

We were down by 2 touchdowns with only 2:09 to go before the Hawks went on their tear.  We were outplayed for 95% of that game.  And, an argument could be made that it was the coin toss that won us the game.  Nice job, Tavaris Jackson!!!

We have a Superbowl to win, now.  And, we ain't going to do that with 4 interceptions, a fumbled punt return and defense that isn't its normal ass kicking self.

Let's be excited!  But, unlike last year, we can't be cocky this time.  Green Bay played a better over all game.  We played a better 3 minutes.  I am proud of the team!  I am excited to be a 12th Man.  But, I also know how close that really was.  We need a much better game next week.

Check out Russell Wilson's post game interview.  He knows he struggled.  He's emotional, not just because they're going to the Superbowl, but because he knows they almost lost it.



Great job, Seahawks!  Great job, Russell Wilson!  I am so HYPED to watch my team defend their championship!  Let's just not have another game like 2 weeks from now.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Ben Franklin was my favorite president!

For a bazillion reasons.  But, this is article just solidifies my favoritism.

Ben Franklin wrote an essay about farting!!

Specifically, he was basically telling scientists that they needed to invent a way to make farts smell good.

Here's the best line from the essay: "Were it not for the odiously offensive Smell accompanying such Escapes, polite People would probably be under no more Restraint in discharging such Wind in Company, than they are in spitting, or in blowing their Noses."

Would you expect anything less coming from the guy who wrote the Constitution?

You see, Ben Franklin was very forward thinking.  He knew that some 230+ years later, some ridiculously good looking gentleman would be sitting in his office all alone.  He would know that this gentleman may be in his office, without visitors for quite some time.  This gentleman will perhaps suspect that he may not see a real live person for a good chuck of the afternoon because many of his colleagues are working remotely or tied up in meetings that day.  Therefore, this gentleman may just get comfortable enough in his closed surroundings to "let one go," shall we say.  It is not impossible, in fact science (aka...the number of times this has happened to this nameless gentleman) has shown that it is rather likely, that another person will indeed unexpectedly pop into this gentleman's office not 10 seconds after pressure was relieved leaving a noticeable cloud of odor lingering in the vicinity.

Ben Franklin, genius that we was, likely foresaw the awkward silence that followed the entrance to the office.  Where the colleague once had a smile, a funny sneer has appeared as the new arrival looks around the room, eyes finally settling on those of the gentleman who is sitting in his chair innocently trying to convey a look of "Nothing is wrong in this room...everything is completely normal and the air is totally clean and clear.  There is obviously no fart smell here...in fact, I don't even know why you may think that and I am certainly not going to outwardly suggest that you may be thinking it on the off chance that you weren't.  Actually, are you sure that's not your cologne?"

Thank you, Dr. Franklin.  Not only did you help found our country...you reminded us all that even giants among men occasionally need to cut the cheese.


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Adverts

UPDATE: Ads are live!!!  Sorry for that, kinda.  But, not really. :-)  I'm mostly curious to see what they can bring.  Click away!  You know you really want that online degree!  Or, maybe that penis enlargement!
____________________

So...I just signed up for AdSense to make $.25 to a dollar once in a while off this page.  Maybe just enough to pay for the annual renewal. :-)

I added a wiget on the side for ads, but the instructions aren't clear as to how I get final approval.  They sort of make it look like I need to place it prominently in the blog.  So...here goes!




Go ahead!  Click on it!  I know you want to!  In fact...click on it 100 times!

Not sure how much money I get for clicks.  Could be a penny.  Could be a dime.  Don't know.  We'll see, I guess.

In Case You Missed It, Michael Keaton's Golden Globe Acceptance Speech

I haven't seen Birdman, yet.  But, I really want to.  I'm waiting for it to come out on video.  Although, my buddy just hooked me up with a digital copy, so I will try to watch it this weekend.

Regardless...check out Michael Keaton's acceptance speech.

I love when famous people show their humanity.  I get tired of people thanking their lawyers and their agents and yes...even God.  This is the kind of speech that makes you happy.


Monday, January 12, 2015

Jason's Movie Review - Annie

Went to see Annie this weekend.  Here's what I thought.

First of all, a reminder.  I love musicals.  I almost always have a song going through my head.  I haven't seen Annie on stage since I was in High School.  However, I have seen the original movie a dozen times.

Whenever anything is rebooted, I try to judge it on it's own merits.  I try not to compare it to previous versions.  This was hard to do with the new Annie, however.  I think the fact that it's a musical makes it more difficult.  When a tune is changed or songs are added and eliminated, I can't help but find myself missing the old version.

Let me address Annie herself, first.  Since some controversy seemed to be stirred when the public learned that Annie and Daddy Warbucks...aka William Stacks in this movie...were *GASP* black!

The little girl who played Annie was quite good!  I enjoyed her performance a ton.  I thought she pulled off the sassy little foster kid (don't call her an orphan) to a tee.  I don't mind that she didn't have red hair.  If they had made her less sassy, I would have been annoyed.

Jamie Fox, on the other hand.  He's one of my favorite actors.  I can't decide how I feel about him as the Daddy character.  He was a fine actor.  But, I think my hesitancy to like his performance more is less about the fact that it's Jamie Fox and more about the fact that he is NOT Oliver Warbucks.  He's William Stacks.  Why is he William Stacks?

Warbucks is a billionaire industrialist.  Stacks is a cell phone CEO.  Warbucks has a HUGE house in New York.  Stacks lives in a penthouse apartment.  Warbucks has servants running all over the place (who contribute to a fantastic "I Think I'm Gonna Like It Here" musical interlude).  Stacks just has his Chief of Staff (who tries to duplicate "I Think I'm Gonna Like It Here" unsuccessfully).

Then there is Miss Hannigan.  Now, you know there is no way ANYBODY is going to be able to hold a candle to Carol Burnett.  Nobody.  But, come on...Cameron Diaz?  She can't even sing!

Obviously, when you take an original set during the depression and try to reboot it in 2014, there must be some changes.  Unfortunately, I think those changes took away from much of the warm-fuzziness that the original brought.

Ok, outside of that.  There are too many plot holes this time around, too.  I know we have to suspend disbelief, and I am usually cool with that.  But, some of these were just too glaring.

For example...the most annoying one that stands out in my mind.  Who the heck are these people they recruit to be Annie's "parents?"  In the original, it was clear.  It was Rooster and Lily, out to make some $$$.  In this one, it's clear who's trying to make money.  The political dude and Miss Hannigan.  But, where do they find a couple who is not just willing to commit fraud, but also willing to kidnap a child?  One could make the point that they didn't actually know it was kidnapping.  When Stacks showed up in his helicopter, they seemed surprised.  However...they were still running from the cops.  So...kidnappers they are!

Then, there is the fact that, after everything comes out regarding an employee of Stacks basically coordinating this kidnapping...not only is there no chance he'll be elected mayor, but if his company is publicly traded, you can bet he just lost his job, too!

Anyway, I wasn't a big fan.  It just wasn't a good enough reboot for me. All it did was make me want to go back and watch the old version.  In fact, I think I will do just that this weekend!




PS:  At about 3:10 in this video is the #1 reason why is was stupid to change the name from Warbucks to Stacks.  This part wasn't even in the movie.  *sigh*


For anyone that needs to hear this...Parenting is FREAKING hard!

Ok, it's time to get real, folks.   Do you have that friend or that family member that clearly lives the perfect life on Facebook and In...