What I am Thankful for - 2020 edition

 Wow...this year has really been different.  Makes one take a step back and think of all the things we have taken for granted.  Every year at Thanksgiving, I try to reflect on the things that I am grateful for.  This year, that list looks a bit different. 

Let's just get my family and friends out of the way as a given.  I am always thankful that I have been blessed with amazing people in my life.  

But, I want to reflect on more this year. 

This year I am grateful for the following:

• Healthcare workers.  Recently, I heard someone say, "Did you know doctors and nurses can quit?"  I mean, I knew that, sure.  But, I didn't really think about it.  They can quit.  But, they haven't.  They are going to work every day, in full PPE, taking care of people at risk to their own health and the health of their families.  These people are the heros of 2020.  Thank you for doing what you do.  
• Desmond's teachers.  Last year, nobody really knew what they were doing.  We were all winging it, hoping that things would be back to normal in the fall.  They weren't.  But, Our Lady of Guadalupe Middle School stepped the Eff up!  I can not overstate how active they have been.  Remote teaching is challening, I am sure.  But, they are doing it!  And, not by simply sending a list of assignments.  Desmond is "in school" from 8:30 - 3 every day.  Granted, it's via the internet, but his teachers are right there, on screen, teaching class and answering questions.  I went into the year wondering if it's worth it to pay the $800 a month for remote learning we could offer Des for free through public school.  The answer is 1000% yes!  This is levels above.  Desmond will be absoultey be ready for 7th grade. 
• Owen's teachers.  The Mount is another story altogether.  Because they are part of an assisted living facility, they haven't had to close.  And, while many kids have been pulled out by their parents, nothing has been made easier for the staff.  They have to wear masks ALL DAY.  They have to communicate with parents via email and phone instead of in person.  And, they still have to deal with all the gooiness that is a toddler and their 20 toddler friends.  And, Marie, the Director.  Bless that woman!  She gets hollared at every day by parents that don't think they're doing enough.  They are doing their best, and their best is pretty damn great. 
• Delivery workers!  Mail men and women, UPS drivers, Amazon delivery, etc.  Your companies (Amazon in particular) are profiting off of this pandemic while you are the ones putting yourselves in harms way.  By doing so, you are keeping us all socially distanced.  It seems like such a mundane thing.  But, we would be screwed without you.  Grocery stores would be packed, even more restaraunts would be forced to close, and Christmas would be cancelled!  Thank you for bringing us everything we need. 
• Scientists.  The geniuses bringing us a vaccine with unheard of haste!  It's been less than a year and the state of Washington is talking about delivering vaccines to the most at risk people and front line workers by Christmas!  Thank you for the sleepless nights and all the time away from your families!  Thank you for also pushing ahead dispite the insults being lobbed at many of you from the most powerful person on Earth.  You are selfless and we are grateful 
• Everyone that follows the rules.  Mask wearers, social distancers and those that stayed home for Thanksgiving.  Even with a vaccine, this virus is going to hang on for a LOOONG time if people can't start following the rules.  To those that wear their mask in public, thank you!  To those that stay 6 feet (or more) away from me and my loved ones, thank you!  To those that thought of our country instead of themselves and opted for a meal at home instead of a meal at Grandma's, thank you.  This all sucks.  But, American's have been known for coming together and sacrificing for the greater good...until 2016.  But, for those that care for others, thank you for what you do. 

I feel like the end is near.  We're in a really shitty time at the moment.  But, part of me feels like this is a last ditch effort by the darkness that has been consuming us the last few years.  Covid is spiking, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.  How far away is the light?  I think it's closer than we realize. 

Life remains beautiful.  Hard.  But, still beautiful.  I am grateful to get to live it.  

Thank you for reading!  I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! 

(disclaimer - photo is from 2019 as I am not allowed to reveal the 2020 photos, yet)

2019 highlights!

Life, as always, was very blessed in 2019.  Here are some highlights!!

January

Nothing really happened in January.  So, here's a picture of Owen with his Moses stick. 

February

Kimmy and I took kidless vacation.  A 10! day cruise of the Caribbean. I hope we can do it again sometime.  I love this woman!  

March

Desmond's 4th Grade Volleyball team finished the season UNDEFEATED! 

And, I got to finally see my Zags play in the NCAA tournament!  They won the first game but lost the second.  Oh, well...there's always THIS YEAR!

April

Owen befriended the neighborhood squirrels.

We visited the parental units and said goodbye to a Lake Havasu landmark.

May

I joined a Beach Volleyball team!  We got our asses kicked by 20somethings.  But, we had a great time!  And, I didn't die! 

Kimmy got to meet Laura, one of my 13 favorite cousins!!!

Lots of visitors this month as we had 3 grandparents here at once!

June

Desmond's school choir got to sing the National Anthem at a Mariners Game. 

Which meant Owen got to attend his very first pro ball game!

July

Desmond completed one of his biggest Lego sets...an award from Dad and Bonus Mom for finishing the year with Straight As

He also performed as one of the Sailors in a summer production of Mary Poppins. 

In the meantime, Owen found his own performance style. 

August

Kim and I split up to tackle 2 sets of Grandparents.  Kim and Owen went to visit G&G Romine. 

And Desmond and I went to went to Lake Havasu to visit G&G Pankow where I proceeded to take zero pictures of the Grandparents, apparently. 

AND...Desmond and I got to schmooz with Weird Al!

We wrapped up the month by taking the boys and Desmond's BFF to Great Wolf Lodge.

September

I left my job at Google and started a new role at Alaska Airlines.  But, we had to hit the Google arcade one last time. 

(Desmond is still unhappy with my decision)

The boys started the new school year!

Kim finally partook in my Seahawks season tickets!

We made a bunch of new friends while drinking and raising money for Providence Mt. Saint Vincent. 

(That guy waving...his name is Kevin!  Actually, it isn't.  But, that's what I called him all night.)

And...Desmond and I climbed the Space Needle for the 2nd time raising $1300 for Fred Hutch!

October

Check out our super cute family photos!

November

Kimmy took me to my favorite sushi place for my birthday (it's becoming a tradition)

And she ate squid. :-) 

Owen got promoted to "Big Boy Bed!"

Desmond and the 5th Graders at OLG got to host Grandma and many others at the Over 65 luncheon. 

And Desmond learned to do Improv!

December

Owen started soccer at Lil Kickers with his school buddy, Scarlett

We got this crazy dog! 

Desmond and I took a big boys trip to Disneyland. 

And Desmond FINALLY went down Splash Mountain!!!

(I told him there would be a camera so he had to make a great face.  After I saw the picture, I asked, "Was that face your fake pose or was that real terror?"  He said, "Maybe a little of both.")

And...we did Christmas in our matching jammies. 

All in all, a good year!  Sure, the Mariners are still terrible, the Game of Thrones finale was a huge letdown and Jennifer Lawrence has still not returned any of my phone calls.  But, damn...I love this little family of mine.  

Peace be with you!  Let's go nail 2020!!! 

Check out this dog

So...we did something I wondered if we would ever do.  We got a freakin' dog!!!

Allow me to introduce to you...Bernadette Peters Pankow!

Here's the story.

Everyone knows that Quincy Pants was my boy.  I won't lie...I still miss that dog.  But, let's be real.  Blind, deaf, allergic to humans...he was high maintenance.  So, when he passed away, not only did I need time to mourn my best buddy...but, we needed a break.

Also, there's the little fact that dogs are messy and my wife is a neat freak.

It's been at least a year, probably a bit more, that I have been not-so-subtlety hinting that I would like to get a new pup.  Desmond, as well, has been asking when the time will come.  And Owen...well, this kid LOVES puppies.

I'm not sure when exactly it happened, but at some point, Kim started expressing an interest in Doodle breeds.  Now...I have never really liked Doodles.  I don't like the course fur (but, the no-shedding is a major plus for Kim) nor do I like how trendy they are.  Everyone, nowadays, is getting a Doodle of some kind.  Labradoodle, Sheepidoodle, Cockadoodle (that's a cockapoo/Poodle mix), the list goes on.  However...as I said to her, if it gets me a dog, I can learn to love a doodle.

Then, she introduces me (Kim introduces me...I didn't find this) to the Bernedoodle.  A Bernese Mountain Dog/Poodle mix.  I love the Bernese.  Big, fluffy, smart, etc.  We have some friends that have one and I think the dog is amazing.  Kim shows me this Bernedoodle breed and I am intrigued.

Oh...she also starts following, like, 27 breeders.

On a couple occasions, she would say to me, "OMG, Look at this puppy!  I want her!"  But, it was never the right time.  We have a 2 and a half year old who STILL doesn't sleep in his own bed all night.

But then...something changed.  Kim shows me this picture:

Along with a caption about how this sweet girl is the last left in her litter.  Kimmy must have thought she was lonely or something.  Because we decided to go meet the breeder.  But, we weren't going to get a dog.  I am going out of town this weekend, we have Christmas, we still have a toddler and we're going on vacation in the spring.  Let's just go, meet the breeder, see the dogs and maybe get on the list for a spring litter.

Yeah...that didn't happen.

We got there and there is this little furball.  Very quiet.  The breeder said nobody wanted her because she was so quiet.  They thought there was something wrong with her.  Kim, however, LOVES the idea of a quiet dog.

So...somehow, we brought a dog home.

And she is SUPER SWEET!  She's very shy.  We finally heard her bark last night (about 32 hours later) when she didn't want to be crated.  She is a cuddle bug!  She's still getting to know us a bit.  And nighttime is hard (she wants to play at 2 AM), but we'll get there.  She's really good at going potty outside (which is amazing!)  Now we just need to get her crate trained and sleeping through the night.

Anyway...my Instagram followers should expect a lot of puppy photos in the near future.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday!

So...I love Thanksgiving!  And, it's not just because of the food...even though I LOVE food.  Like, love it.  When I think of Thanksgiving, "Feed Me, Seymore" immediately pops into my head.

No...I love Thanksgiving because I am truly grateful for so much.  So, so much.

I am grateful for my parents.  A couple working folks who never made a ton of money but still managed to support me through 12 years of school, band, drama, and then help me go to a very expensive and life changing college.  My mom and dad are easily the biggest reason I am who and where I am, today. 

I am grateful for my wife.  She picked up a broken guy (more broken than I probably let on when we started dating) and made me her husband.  She lifts me up with her smiles, her encouragement and her daily love.  She fuels me every day and I don't thank her nearly as much as I should.

I am thankful for my boys.  Desmond and Owen...the reasons I do anything.  I have been blessed with boys who make me remarkably proud.  I hope I can be a worthy dad to both of them.

I am grateful for my friends.  Some of my very best friends have no reason for being in my life.  It just kinda happened.  And, I can't imagine life without you. 

I am grateful for OLG...our church/school community.  I know that if I ever found myself down and out, you would pick me up.  Just because we're part of the same community. 

I am grateful for my education...I called Gonzaga life changing.  For me, that is a true statement.  My path changed while I was there.  At the time, it might not have been obvious.  But, today...I still reflect on many of the things I learned there.  Mostly, things that, I believe, make me a better human and (hopefully) bring me closer to God. 

I am grateful for my career.  I love what I do.  Work isn't just a job for me.  I genuinely enjoy it.  I help change peoples' lives...hopefully for the better.  And, that makes me happy.

I am thankful for life.  Sometimes, it's hard.  Sometimes, it's lonely.  But, every single day, it is blessed.  And, I am grateful.

I am thankful for you...the person reading this.  Because, you care enough to read my blog!  I don't post nearly as much as I used to.  But, you're still here!  And, I appreciate that!  Thank you for reading.

Happy Thanksgiving!  God Bless you and your family!  If you receive even a fraction of the blessings I have, you will be living a wonderful life! 

New Year...New Optimism

I didn't post much last year.  I tried a couple times.  I see a few drafts in here.  Most importantly a reflection on the passing of a personal hero: John McCain.  Also, a bragadocious post about how I met Weird Al Yankovic!  But, I never got around to finishing them.

2018 has been interesting.  I'll be honest...it's been pretty rough.  Not 2012 rough, that's for sure.  But, still...it will not go down as one of my favorites.  Lack of sleep, stress, family issues, deaths.  All in the rear view mirror, now.

Let's look forward, now.  Here's what I am excited for in 2019!!!

1. VACATION!  Kim and I are taking a 10 day cruise in Feb.  With no children!!!  Don't get me wrong.  I love my boys.  But, being able to add "Sleep" and "Not needing to keep other humans alive" to my usual list of "No email, no phone calls and no commitments" is going to be very, very nice!
2. My boys!  I feel like I gotta back up that last bullet with this one.  My kids are amazing!  Sure, Owen doesn't let us sleep and Desmond appears to be hitting that emotional pre-pubescent stage.  But, they are REALLY REALLY REALLY great boys.  Like, really great!  Opie is growing fast, talking up a storm and still loves to dish out hugs.  Desmond is killing it in school (almost straight As) and starting to take up more hobbies that don't involve a screen.  He's just wrapping up a dance class and is about to start volleyball.  As with every year, I am excited to see how they grow. 
3. VACATION!!!  Did I mention this already?  Oh...well, I'm still excited! 
4. Politics!  Just kidding...I'm not excited about that at all. 
5. My wife! I have an amazing wife.  Probably the best wife in the world.  I can't say for sure because I haven't met all wives.  But, I have met a lot of them and I definitely scored!  2018 was tough for her, too.  Much harder than it was for me.  I am looking forward to more time together, just the 2 of us.  We've committed to locking in a babysitter so we can enjoy more adult time.  She deserves a better year.  I am hoping to help contribute to it.  
6. Prayer.  Yeah, yeah...hokey, whatever.  But, I have been trying to really rediscover prayer.  I pray frequently.  But, there has rarely been much structure to it.  If been trying to find more meditation and contemplation in my prayer.  I have been busting out my rosary more often and really enjoy the time.  I even found a Catholics at Google group that prays together over video conferencing once a week.  I can only join once in a while, but when I do, I get a lot out of it. 
7. Interstellar space travel.  Probably won't happen in 2019...but, it's coming!!!  Maybe even in my lifetime!  Might as well get excited about it, now! 
8. And, a lot more! 

It's hard to list everything out.  I have friends who have had personal triumphs that bring joy to my heart!  I have others that have suffered personal tragedy.  Cancer has reared it's ugly face again to a friend.  Another friend is expecting a baby through a surrogate after many years of struggle.  

Maybe it really is a great time to get back to my blog.  Because no matter what, triumph, tragedy, heartbreak, love, success, failure, whatever...there is so much to be optimistic about.  Life is beautiful!  

Frederick Pankow - Lifelong Educator and GREAT Grandpa

We lost a great great man, today.  My grandpa, Fred Pankow.

I have many memories of my grandpa.  I spent most summers with him and Grandma in Michigan when I was younger.  I didn't get out there nearly as much as I should have as an adult.  But, I still looked up to him more than any other man in my life outside of my dad. 

I could share many of those memories with you, now.  Of fishing on Lake Miramichi, of trips to Florida, Canada or Mackinac Island, of hatching ducklings, or of the many letters he sent me offering me a quarter for every spelling error I found.

Instead, I would like to present you with another story.  Grandpa loved to tell (and write) stories.  This one is my favorite.  Grandpa was a lifelong educator.  He started as a high school teacher and retired superintendent.  He even has a school named after him.

I regret that I wasn't able to have him meet Owen in person.  I will miss him.  I will miss his stories. 

Please enjoy.

_________________________________________________________________   

I REMEMBER My First Year as a Teacher, 1948-1949 

By Fred Pankow 

　 

Joyce and I drove many miles on Michigan highways visiting several school districts seeking interviews for my first teaching position. Interviews were also conducted at the placement office of Central Michigan University; it is the school from which I graduated. Our first child (Gary) was born during final exam time at Central and the timing of his birth got me excused from one examination. With graduation my hope was to find a physical education teaching position. I soon learned that there were none, however, there seemed to be jobs for those who would accept positions which included coaching boys athletic teams. In those days girls had no competitive teams in most school districts. To find a teaching job I had to become a coach. I soon found such a position. On my first visit to Byron it seemed it was a long way into the countryside. I mentioned to Joyce, “We are going to run out of road before we get to this town.” After a few months the rather long drives to the big towns were a pleasure through the beautiful farmland. 

　 

In 1948 teachers were hired for whatever salary they agreed to. There was no union or salary schedule. There was no extra pay for and no bargaining about extra duties which may be assigned. A typical teaching assignment was one of, or a combination of, these subject areas: social studies, English, commercial, agriculture, homemaking, mathematics, wood shop, etc. My contract was as teacher of social studies, and sports’ teams’ coach. I looked forward to my assignment at $3,000 for the school year and was very happy to have found work. 

　 

As the coach for all sports it soon became apparent that field preparation, hiring officials, and recruiting ticket takers for home games was also my responsibility. It was on the job training. 

　 

The football team was 6-man football. I was coaching the first 6-man football team I had ever seen. We lacked some things: but never lacked team spirit or support from the community. A team father, John Dyer marked off the football field for me; his son Bill played on the team. We even had a lighted field which was built by the community. I continue to hear from Wanda (Dyer), Bill’s sister, and her husband Darrell Barnhart to this day. 

　 

We had two basketball teams. Games were played in the Town Hall where the playing court was less than regulation size. The team dressed in a room which was, at one time, a small storage room in the basement of the hall. There were no showers only a few benches. 

　 

Spring brought with it preparation for the baseball season. I learned to drive a school bus; at times I transported the team to away games. For home games it was my duty to coach the team and prepare the ball diamond. The equipment and much of the labor, for preparing the diamond, came from members of the community. Our home game umpire (only one was used standing behind the pitcher) was a full-time farmer and part time umpire, Henry Bird. Mr. Bird had the full umpire uniform and was totally aware of the rules of the game. He taught me a few things. 

　 

Shortly after we first moved to town (July. 1948) the Superintendent asked me to go to the Chevrolet auto dealer, in Owosso, and obtain the driver training car for the year. When I spoke to the dealership owner he informed me, “I am not providing a driver training car this year.” He felt there had been a problem the previous year, however, he was nice enough to once again provide the automobile for our students. Perhaps he felt sorry for the new kid on the block. 

　 

As the social studies teacher my assignment included 12th grade Civics (government), American History and World History I was also assigned the teaching of a chemistry class because I had taken college chemistry classes. As the chemistry teacher I began to clean the glass fronted chemical storage cabinets. There were mysterious powders, and bottles of liquids of unknown purpose with labels long gone. 

　 

As the 12th grade Civics teacher I became senior class advisor. No big deal, right? However, I soon learned that after graduation the graduating class takes an annual school bus trip to Washington, D.C and I would be the chaperon in charge. More on the job training. Other chaperons were the bus driver/mechanic Lyle Fisher and his wife Mae and another teacher (female). Lyle and Mae had taken the trip in previous years which relieved me of much anxiety. The students had saved, in the class treasury, from kindergarten for this trip. Housing during the trip was to be school district supplied tents which were packed in the rear of the bus. I was informed, by the superintendent, that the girls should wear dresses on the trip. The father, of one class member, privately informed me that his daughter, had but one dress. In preparation for the trip I informed the girls that they must wear dresses “on the day we left town.” (From then on they wore slacks.) Thanks to great chaperons and cooperative students we had a ball and all went well. We never used the tents. We slept in motels paid for from the class funds. 

　 

The annual community potluck athletic banquet was also the responsibility of the coach. The dinner went well except one table, loaded with food, tipped when people sat on the bench type seat attached to one side of the table. The families set up again and we went about our business. The number attending exceeded our expectations, however, there is never a shortage of good food at a farmland potluck. 

　 

In the middle of this first year I was named school principal. No specifics were given; but it seemed to be for all grades. The reason for the appointment was that someone had to be in charge during the absence of the superintendent. There was no change in any other assignments or salary. I was now “Principal”, “Teacher”, “Coach”, “Senior Class Sponsor”. My office was a former cloak room 8’ x 8’ with all the coat hooks still on three walls. The room would do as I was seldom there. 

　 

As principal I assumed student attendance was one of my responsibilities. For example, there were two brothers with a single parent father. One morning one of the boys told me his brother was still in bed. Knowing the father was at work out of town I went to their apartment: threw the covers off the sleeping brother, got him dressed, and off to school we went. Try that today. On another occasion a young man was not in school. His mother told me he had told her there was no school and he went fishing. I went to the pond, stopped the fishing, and marched him to school. I love this scene because a teacher, who saw us, said, “Tom Sawyer, if I ever saw it. The boy in coveralls and the principal in a suit and tie marching single file back to school from the fishing hole.” 

　 

Near the end of that first year I learned that annually the seniors took a “Skip” day. In the absence of any outside advice I made my first administrative decision. I informed the senior class of 22 members, that they could be excused from school for their skip day (cheers), however, there was one stipulation. I would “skip” with them (no cheers) and it would be a planned day. We went on an all-day trip in four automobiles, first we went via the bridge to Canada and back via the Detroit/Windsor Tunnel. We visited Metro Airport, went to dinner, then back home. Only negative, one busted headlight. The “skip“ day was a great success. Eleventh graders asked if they could do it next year. Some of these students had never been far from home and to visit Canada was to go to a foreign country. 

　 

Somehow, I became the announcer for the annual school/community Christmas program. The parents always love the performance of their children which made the announcer look good also. At one Christmas time, while I was at the Church Christmas service someone had tied a live, old, toothless sheep in my life sized lighted manger scene. (Joyce was home ill but was sworn to secrecy). It turned out to be the Board of Education President (Robert Wiles) and Secretary (Lee McLaughlin) I got $9 for the ewe and Lee did not charge me for hauling it to Detroit to the stockyard. There is a follow up to that story. Several weeks later I kept an appointment with a medical doctor in Gaines, a neighboring village, as I entered the doctor’s office and gave my name he said, “Oh! You’re the sheep man.” 

　 

Not only did I have many opportunities to fish in the local Mill Pond, in a borrowed row boat, but I also learned a great deal those first few years: thanks to the superintendent who found plenty for me to do; the students and community adults who made my years there mostly fun, and the staff members who could not have been more helpful in this farming country surrounding the little town of Byron, Michigan. 

　 

P.S. Having lost many more games than we won I was soon replaced as coach. Eventually I was relieved of some of my other responsibilities. During my last two years in Byron I was promoted to Superintendent of Schools (final salary $6,000). With the help of an excellent “school law” attorney, and a dedicated Board of Education, we annexed two and one half primary school districts (closed one room schools). Soon thereafter the Byron Agricultural School District built a new elementary school, a gymnasium, and a new modern football field. During the years in Byron, Joyce gave birth to our daughter (Colleen) and son (Brian). Joyce was always my support and a wonderful mother and homemaker. 

It is possible I acquired more practical knowledge in Byron than I had in four years of formal college class work. The old three story (basement plus two) brick school building is gone now and the district has grown in size and added several modern school buildings. I wonder if the community is having as much fun and as few heartaches as we had during the seven years the Pankow family was in town.