Often, when you don't have kids, people love to tell you about how you will feel when you do have kids.
"You'll understand when you have kids," was (and still would be if I still heard it) one of the most annoying things someone could say to me. Many things I heard about "Parenthood" I thought were bogus. "You'll understand when you have kids," was the reply.
Well...I am here to debunk some of those rumors. Starting with this one:
"When you're a parent, grossness takes on a whole new meaning...almost nothing grosses you out. Spit, barf, poop...piece of cake."
BOGUS! This is a total lie.
I am here to tell you...I am a parent. Here is a list of some things that still gross me out:
The way some people have talked to me, they can swim in baby poop and not be affected. I'd like to see them try. Because, when Desi has a blow out, I want to bring the hose in the house and wash everything off before I let my hands anywhere near that yellow runny mess. Unfortunately, I can't do that, so I go through about 25 wipes and a couple bath towels to get him cleaned up, all the while trying not to gag at the smell and the fact that I have poop on my hands.
Then there is the spit-up and vomit. Desi has already managed to ruin quite a few of my shirts. I don't mind that my shirts are ruined...what I mind is the fact that now, all I can smell is sour milk mixed with stomach acid.
Now...many baby books have talked about how skin to skin time is important. Because I want to be a good dad, I will frequently lay Desi on my chest without a shirt on. People that know me are aware that I have a sweater on under my shirt (ie: I'm a hairy dude). Being a parent, I now know a new grossness. Baby vomit in my chest hair. TMI, I'm sure...but, necessary in debunking this rumor.
So...for all you non-parents, whenever you are told by a parent that you aren't grossed out by anything, anymore, tell them to stuff it. Because...even with baby, even after changing diapers, even after getting barfed on...every time, I still think it's gross. Bleh.
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