Elementary, my dear daddy.

This morning, I am trying my hardest to style my hair in a way that hides the fact that I am losing it all faster every day.  Desi is downstairs, supposedly, getting his shoes on.  All of a sudden I hear, "DADDY!"

"WHAT?" I yell back.  We're on two separate floors, you see.  It would take too much time to actually go to each other.

"SOMEONE ATE MY CANDY WHILE I WAS SLEEPING!"

It seems that Desi had located an empty Tootsie Roll wrapper on the table right next to my Xbox controller which was sitting very near to the spot on the couch where I often relax to read, watch TV or...I don't know...play Xbox and veg out. 

I started to get nervous.  He was onto me.  He runs upstairs and shows me the wrapper.

"Look!  Someone ate it!" he says.  "Someone ate it without asking me."

"Uhhhh..." I stammer as my eyes dart back and forth.  "Who do you think it was?"

"I think it was Satchmo,"  He responds.  This was unexpected.

"Why do you think it was Satchmo?"  I ask? 

"Well...she was standing on the table and she ran away as soon as she saw me looking at her." 

Hmmm...sounds like a solid deduction to me.  Still, I couldn't let Satchmo take the blame for something she didn't do.

"Buddy...it wasn't Satchmo who ate your candy."  I told him.

"It was Quincy." 

Flash Super Move!

Ok...so I have this video game called Injustice: Gods Among Us.  It's basically a fighting game that puts the heroes and villains from the DC universe against each other.

Since it's a fighting game, I don't play it in front of Desi.  However, recently, he saw the box for the game (which looks like the pic to the right) and asked, very nicely, if I would play it so he could watch. 

I said No.

He asked again.

I said No again. 

Finally, he asked again very nicely and promised that he would continue to keep his hands to himself at school and be good and not play fight with his friends.  So, I gave in.

I turned on the game and Desi orders me to play as the Flash.  So, I do.

Now, in this game, each super hero has a supermove.  It's more or less a cutscene of them using their super powers to beat up their opponent.  Here is what the Flash's looks like:




In case you can't see it...in a nutshell, the Flash knocks his opponent into the air, then proceeds to run ALL THE WAY AROUND THE ENTIRE WORLD before punching the guy another two times, the last one knocking his opponent to the ground.

After seeing this, Desi proceeds to put on his Flash costume and ask if we can go outside to play guys. 

Playing guys typically involves Desi playing a super hero of some sort and me playing a bad guy.  Which bad guy is usually determined by Desi.  In this case, I am told I will be "Slow Man."  Not the kind of villain I expected would be a strong opponent to the Flash.

Anyway...we go outside to play and I record Desi performing the following super move. 


WP 20130616 010 from Jason Pankow on Vimeo.

 

And, there you have it.  Desi wins. 

Conversation pieces

Reading Charlotte's Web with Desi. Just read the chapter where Wilber learns the farmer plans to kill him when he's bigger.

Desi: "Why are they going to kill him?"

Me: "Because they will eat him."

Desi: "Why would they eat him?"

Me: "Because some people eat pigs."

Desi: "Yuck! I don't want to eat pigs."

Me: "Did you know bacon is made from pigs."

Desi: "Oh." *smiling* "I love bacon."

That's my boy.

T-ball

We decided to sign Desi up for T-ball this year!  AND...I decided to coach!  A little nervous about it.  But, what could go wrong?  I mean, it's just 12 four and five year olds.  Not like they can get out of control or anything, right?

Right?

Anyway...I thought this movie clip is appropriate.

There are many paths to Heaven

So...I dragged Desi to church this weekend.  He's not a fan, for obvious reasons.  Anyone who remembers going to church as a kid knows why.  It's boring as hell...wait...I mean, it's boring.  Even as an adult, church bores me.  I currently really like my church because the priest is great and tends to deliver an ear catching sermon.  But, Desi doesn't care about that crap.  He wants to play Angry Birds.

Anyway, this church is really tolerant of kids.  At many churches, you can hear the grumbling around you when a kid gets antsy.  And, let's face it, what 4 year old would not get antsy when forced to sit quietly during an event which doesn't once refer to Batman or fart jokes? 

My church has these little doodle pads in the pew for kids to use to draw on.  Desi wanted to draw on one.  Actually, he drew on 3.  There were none left in that particular pew for future kids.  Not very Christian of him.  Whatever.

Anyway, he basically drew a big ass scribble. 

After scribbling, he shows me his masterpiece.  "What is this?" I ask.

Desi: "I drew a map!  It's a map to heaven."  He is showing me how the lines end at the picture of Jesus and the children. Then he goes on to say, "See...there are many different ways to get to heaven."

I thought this was ridiculously profound and I had to keep the scribbles.  For those of you that ever talk with me about religion, you know that I am not a "You must agree with me or you're going to hell," kinda guy.  I am Catholic, but I would never ever tell you that my way is the only way and that my faith is the only faith.  In fact, I will tell you that I am pretty sure the Catholic church has it wrong it certain places.  I choose this faith because it works for me and helps put me on, what I believe, is the right path to heaven. 

Now...someone else, say a Mormon or a Muslim or an Atheist, might take a different path.  That's right...I'm including you non-believing heathens in here as well. 

I don't think God expects us to know all the answers.  This isn't a history quiz.  If it were, God would have given us much clearer instructions.  Basically, he left us nothing.  Some might say he left us the bible.  I would say bogus.  He left us a bunch of people that wrote down a bunch of things that were put into a book.  God giving us the bible would mean God literally threw a book down from the heavens and told us to get reading.  As far as I know, that's not what happened. 

Because God hasn't given us all the answers, I believe, he does not expect us to get everything right.  He expects us to do what's right.  What's right, you ask?  Well...love your neighbor.  Help those that need help.  Don't judge other people.  You know...all that liberal hippie stuff. 

There are many paths to heaven.  What's yours?

We are all marathoners

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2013/04/15/if-you-are-losing-faith-in-human-nature-go-out-and-watch-a-marathon/

I just read this article and it resonated with me.  But, not for the reasons the author mentions.
Everything he says is true.  Running a marathon is hard.  It's damn hard.  It takes a lot of work and a lot of strength.  But, even more than that, it takes a strong will and a determination to succeed.  I have now run 2 half marathons and 2 full marathons.  My times would certainly not qualify me for the Boston, but I am very proud of myself nonetheless.  IMHO, I have every right to be proud.

But, again...this isn't what I thought of when I read the title of the article.  What I thought of isn't just the runners.  What I thought of were the friends, family and the spectators of the run.
Running is not easy for me.  If you know me well, you have probably heard me complain about running.  But, I do it anyway.

When I have run races, the courses are filled with people cheering me on.  I don't know these people.  Chances are they are there for someone else.  But, it doesn't matter.  They are cheering for me, too.  They are holding up signs like, "Worst parade ever," or, "Runners are sexy," or, my favorite, "Keep going, Keep going!  That's what she said."

They are giving me high fives!  Telling me what a great job I am doing dispite the fact that I look like death.  They smile at me and often get me to smile back even though I just want my legs to fall off.  When I am done, they tell me what a great accomplishment it was and how proud they are of me.  Strangers.  Strangers tell me how proud they are of me.  When I finished the Goofy Challenge, I got a hug from a fellow runner.  A person I have never met. We congratulated each other and moved on.  It was wonderful.

Some people suck.  But, it's only some of them.  The majority of people are amazing.  They cheer you on.  They help pick you up. They hug you when you succeed.

We're all marathoners.  Even if we're cheering from the sidelines.

My son stiffles my creativity

Desi has a tremendous imagination.  I love to watch him play with his toys.  Action figures, stuffies, whatever.  He is really great at playing by himself and creating worlds to play in.

However...when I play with him, I get nothing but rejection!!!  Let me give an example.

Last night, Desi asked if I would play with him during bath time (meaning he's in the bath and I am kneeling outside the bath, perverts).  I said sure.

He has a collection of superheroes that he plays with in the bath.  Recently a couple of Transformers were added to this collection.  Apparently, the super heroes (which for this run consisted of Wolverine, the Flash, Batman and Hawkman) were supposed to be trapped on a raft in the middle of a poisonous ocean.  One of the Transformers, either Optimus Prime or Bumblebee, neither of whom transform into boats, for the record, would save them.

Okay...so here's what went down.  I was playing the role of all of the super heroes.  Wolverine was trapped on the raft.  His super-friends (one of whom can fly and another of whom has a both a boat and a helicopter) are standing helplessly on shore hoping someone will save their friend.

Then...Optimus Prime, in transformed position, races, underwater, to the raft and rescues Wolverine!!!  He takes Wolverine back to the shore to be with his friends! 

Here is where I decided to improvise a little, because I am creative like that. 

The friends are so excited that they rush over to Wolverine to make sure he's okay.  In the excited commotion, Batman falls into the poisonous ocean!  "Oh No!" I cry.  "Batman is in the poisonous ocean!  Who will save him?"

Expecting Bumblebee to dive in, I was shocked to hear, "NO DADDY!  That's not what you're supposed to do!  He has to be on the raft!!!"  At which point, Desi goes all diva, breaks character, removes Batman from the bath, puts him back on the ledge and proceeds to instruct me to put Batman on the raft so he can be saved.

I mean, come on!  Clearly we have established that the Transformers can drive underwater.  What gives?  I can't work under these conditions. 

Conversation Pieces

Desi: "Daddy, when can we have artichokes for dinner with pickles and chicken?"

Me: "????"

Run Disney and Goofy's Race and a Half Challenge!

Just got back from a vacation to Disney World with my folks and Desi.  Why Disney World, you ask?  Why drop the clams to fly to Florida when Disneyland is much closer.

One word...Goofy's-Race-And-A-Half-Challenge.

See, I have decided to reboot myself in 2013.  It's hard to explain, but I needed to set some kind of goal for myself to kick off the new year and my new life.  I decided that a worthy goal would be to run a marathon.  Last year, I ran my first half marathon in Seattle.  This year, let's up the ante.  But...where should I do this?  A destination marathon would be more inspiring to keep me training and motivated to continue.  But, where to?

That's around the time I heard of RunDisney.  Apparently, Disneyland and Disney World occasionally hold running events at the parks.  This year happened to be the 20th anniversary of the Walt Disney World Marathon.  Sounds awesome!  Sign me up.

Oh...but then I learn about this thing called Goofy's Race and a Half Challenge.  To complete the Goofy, you have to complete the half marathon on Saturday AND the full marathon on Sunday.  Keep in mind, I learned this while sitting at a bar with a buddy getting drunk.  Sounded like a horrible and remarkably stupid thing for someone like me to do.

So...I went ahead and signed up.  Cuz I am stupid.

The race was last weekend.  Let me tell you about it.

It was AWESOME!!!  Now, if you remember my postings from last year, while I was training for the Seattle half, I hate running.  This hasn't changed even though I am running much more frequently then I was then.  I still hate it.  It doesn't feel good.  I can never seem to find that magical zone people talk about.  I just generally don't like it.  However, it happens to be the easiest way to exercise and keep yourself in shape when you are busy working and getting divorced and being a single dad and junk. 

But this race was incredible. 

We arrived on Wednesday.  My parents joined us, which was great as Desi had someone to hang out with while I ran.  On Thursday, we hit the park.  A full day at the Magic Kingdom.  I love this place.  Characters, music, parades, etc.  Yes...I know I am a nerd, but few places make me as happy as Disney.  Marketing genius on their parts.

On Thursday night, because it's my elderly parents favorite restaurant in the world or something, we went to Golden Corral.  Big mistake.  In the wee hours of Friday morning, I was yacking in the toilet.  We didn't do much that day.

Saturday was the first race!  A half marathon through Epcot Center and the Magic Kingdom.  I took it slow because A) I had another 26.2 miles to run the next day and B) there are a shit ton of characters to meet!  I am a sucker for Disney characters.  I am a 35 year old man but I still love to give Mickey, Donald and Goofy a big ol' hug!  The race went well.  I felt good!

Until the next morning when my alarm went off at 4:00 AM.  At that point, I was questioning my judgment.  But, I got up and headed back to Epcot.  The full marathon was harder...obviously.  I was keeping really good pace with a pacer.  I didn't take as many pics for the full because I had to be conscious of my time (they pick you up if you don't keep a certain pace) and the pacer waits for nobody!  I ended up hurting my knee around mile 16 which slowed me down further.  I haven't seen my final time, yet...but I think is was somewhere between 6 and 6:15.  Slow...but, I'll still take it. :-)

As a vacation, it was great!  Desi had a blast!  I had a blast.  My folks (I think even my dad) had a blast!  Would I do it again? Absolutely!  Although, it won't be soon because, everything considered, it wasn't a cheap trip. 

Pics below.  In no particular order because I am too lazy to move them around.  2013 is starting off well, so far!!!

Finish line.

All 3 medals!

High 5 from Goofy.

Running out of the castle during the 1/2

Mom! Phineus and Ferb are hanging out with runners, again!

Arr.

After finishing the half.

Left nut and right nut.

Launchpad McQuack! I love this guy!

Desi and Tigger

Pigglet

Can't get enough of Phineus and Ferb, apparently.  Where's Perry?

He's got good taste.

With my best little fan.

My folks and my kid.

After flirting with Cinderella.

Cool light show on the castle.

Next to Belle, Ariel is my favorite.

Things I learned in 2012

First of all, this has easily been the worst year of my life.  Unwanted changes.  A lost marriage.  Shitty news.  Blah!  This year sucked!

But, I learned some things.  Here are the top 10 lessons I am taking away from 2012.

1. Don't take anything for granted.  Ever.  When you do, that's when you will lose it.
2. Friends are priceless.  When you need them, you quickly learn who you can trust most.
3. It doesn't matter how lame my jokes are, my son thinks I am the funniest person in the world and that makes me happy!
4. It doesn't matter how funny I am...my son is funnier.  The stuff that comes out of that kids mouth would make Judge Judy laugh.
5. Life isn't fair.  People aren't fair.  What's important is what you do about it.
6. Friends can be closer than family. 
7. Seattle CAN have a sports franchise to get excited about!  GO SEAHAWKS!!!
8. Real books are better than e-books.
9. Running sucks, but it can improve your mood.
10. Life is amazing. 

I am anxious for 2013.  I am starting a new chapter in this life o' mine.  I am anxious to see what happens next.

Happy New Year!!!

So, now what?

A little about me for those who don't know me or those who have forgotten.

I am a dude.  Meaning I am not a chick. 

I like politics and will probably talk about them frequently.  If you're looking for a Sean Hannity or Rachel Maddow type, you won't find that person here, though.  I am more of a...ummm...well, I can't even think of who I am.  I am a right leaning moderate.  I support both gay rights and gun rights.  I oppose both abortion and the death penalty.  I believe in less government, but in enough government to help our citizens who need it...but, only to help them get back on their feet, not provide for them forever.

I am a Catholic...but, I am a very "American" Catholic.  I get pissed when the Church implies that I am going to hell because I think gay people are A-Okay and loved by God just as much as me.  Maybe even more so.  I think priest should be allowed to marry and I think women should be allowed to be ordained.

I am a dad and I suspect this will take up a VERY large chuck of my blogging.

I am an HR guy in the technology sector.  I have been a recruiter for 12 years and I have only recently moved into a Program Management position where I essentially work on programs to make recruiting easier for those doing it.  It's basically the essence of middle management.  But, the productive kind. :-)

I have a dog that is allergic to people.  Like...really.  Human dander.  Gives him a nasty rash.

I also have a cat...but she's not very exciting.

I like beer.  A lot.  You know how some people are wine snobs or coffee snobs.  I am a beer snob.  I don't drink Bud or Coors or any domestic crap.  And, I will act all self righteous toward those who do.  That beer sucks, man.

Ummm...I like video games.  I'm actually only about 12 years old.

And...I like to write.  I actually really enjoy it.  I have been told that I am not bad, too.  I just need to overcome this 2 year stint of writers block I've been facing.

That's all for now.  Enjoy your weekends!

Upward and Onward

Many moons ago, I kept a personal anonymous blog.  I used it as a venting place.  Could have been politics, religion, entertainment, Harry Potter, Lost, morning commute...basically, anything that I wanted to talk about.

I am finding the urge to do that, again.  However...I also want to get back to blogging about life, like I did a bit in this blog.  So...I am changing this page up a little.  I am giving it a new name, a new address, and a new feel.

For anyone who wants to see mostly pictures of Desi, I recommend you find me on Facebook.  I will still put them here.  But, no longer as a spot to simply put pictures.  I am using Facebook and Skydrive for that.  This will officially be my blogging page.

Everything is 100% me.  Nothing I post is from Microsoft or represents the company or brands I work for.  HOWEVER...I may occasionally post about things relevant to what I do!  I will likely keep my recruiting/HR related posts regulated to Fistful of Talent.  Here, however...I may take the opportunity, however, to gloat about things like how Xbox recently kicked the crap out of the new Nintendo Wii-U in Black Friday Sales!!!  That is me saying that...not my company.

I will also talk politics, so watch out!  If you don't like to hear people talk politics, go away.  I am not a right wing or left wing nutjob.  Believe it or not, I am actually pretty smart and down right moderate (although, I do lean right).  I like a good conversation.  I HATE people that can't think for themselves and just tow the party line.

I will talk about the mundane.  I meant it when I mentioned the morning commute.  One of my most popular posts on my previous site involved how I hate seeing people use babies to ride in the carpool lane.  Even as a dad, I still hate that.  Although...I admit I have made a hypocrite of myself at least once. 

Anyway...if you're interested, stay around.  If you're not, that's fine.  This is for me.  I like to write. :-) 

See you again, soon!!!

Happy New Year from Winnie the Pooh, Ninja Assassin!

Whoa...this is an awesome post title that I have had saved for over a year.  Wish I remembered what the content was.

This blog needs a reboot

Stay tuned.  Many life changes and a renewed desire to blog more.  Going to make this my all up go to page for everything.  Still parenting adventures.  But, also my opinionated rants and raves about just about anything I can think of. 

New title coming.  New URL as well. 

Now that Desi is 18....

Here's some pictures for you. 

Summer:

Don't worry...I gave him his flea meds.

 

With Duncan on the Oregon Coast.

JP and Kevin (Duncan's dad), Oregon Coast.

Fall:

With some kid who hates his job.

 

 

 

And...if you've hung out this long...a video, since it's been 5 months since the last.


Armwrestling. from Jason Pankow on Vimeo.