I have 2 today.
First, Took Desmond to his first eye doctor appt.
Optometrist lady asks, "Do things ever look blurry when you look at them?"
Des looks at her straight faced and says, "Only when I do this..." before crossing his eyes.
The next one, Des flashes me his Despicable Me tattoo and says, "I'm tougher than you! I have a tattoo!"
I flash him my REAL tattoo and say, "Whatever! I have a real tattoo! That's like getting a million shots. You just put yours on with some water."
Des thinks for a second. Then says, "Well, the water was FREEZING COLD!"
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